Expedition Two by Patrick C.

Day One: I was excited for this expedition because we were going to build a log bridge over Gentry Creek. I eagerly got off the bus and started hiking. I was feeling good, and even my backpack didn’t feel too heavy. We hadn’t hiked long before Mr. Mike called an early break. As it turned out, the U.S. Forest Service had taken down all the bridges former FMA classes had built across the creek. I was angry, but I helped Mr. Mike hide the tools we had carried to build the new bridge. Then I got my pack back on and we started hiking again. After I got to camp, I unpacked the tent and set it up, and I climbed into my sleeping bag and went to sleep.

Day Two: I woke up ready for a new and better day. It was cold that morning, and after eating oatmeal for breakfast, I went out to gather wood for the fire. After classes in the morning, I returned to camp for lunch and to check on the fire. I read for a while from the book we had been assigned, Farewell to Manzanar, and then headed back for evening class at 6:00 p.m. That’s when I found out that my tent partners had gotten into trouble, and we had to move our camp next to Mr. Kevin and Mr. Mike’s camp. Not a great start to this expedition so far.

Day Three: Woke up to another cold morning. I packed up my stuff and was ready to go on time. Hiking back and forth across the creek, where the bridges used to be, my feet got soaked and very cold. We have been taught to always check the person hiking behind us whenever we cross slippery or dangerous areas, so I checked behind me often to make sure Mr. Kevin hadn’t fallen into the creek. I got into camp with cold wet feet, set up the tent, and put on dry socks. Then I went to evening class with dry cold feet. I finally got warm again when I climbed into my sleeping bag.

Day Four: I woke up to a morning that just had a great feeling about it. I got my tent partners to hurry, as we got ready for departure, so we could be at the rally point before the instructors. After we got there, Mr. Mike sent me down the trail to the other rally point to let them know there was a delay, but I was still ready when it was time for departure. After we had hiked for a while, we came to this really steep climb. I would climb up to a ledge, then turn around and help Mr. Kevin up, then climb some more and then do the same thing. I would warn him about slippery rocks and other obstacles and slowly, but surely we all made it. It felt great to get into camp, and even better because our camp spot was the best yet. We set up camp, ate lunch, and then headed to class where I learned about hypothermia, and how to recognize it before it is too late to help myself. The air was warm that day, and I was glad to climb into my sleeping bag that night.

Day Five: I woke up to a great morning, made the fire, and made the best oatmeal yet. After morning class, I finished my book and then just chilled around the camp. Later, I ate a big meal of lentils and rice, but it wasn’t very good. All around it was a great day, everything went smoothly and nothing went wrong. That night I climbed into the tent ready for the next day.

Day Six: Last day out. I woke up to a beautiful morning, and packed up and was ready to move out. We had a short class, before hiking out. The hills were killer. The hardest time I had was keeping up. After what seemed like forever, I was glad when we finally got off the trail. My feet started getting tired right as we got to the bus. I was so happy to see that big yellow bus.

The Newest Student by Hope A.

My experience of being one of the last students to arrive at FMA was like being the last born in a family of nine siblings. I came on October 3rd a Saturday night. The surroundings were breathtaking and very home-like. Everyone was very nice, but they were all on Level One. I was on Pre-Level One, so I couldn’t talk to anyone except during work chores or at meals. My free time was spent in my room.

I spent Sunday in my room doing a paper on Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. During the next week, in class, I felt like the other students understood the material better than I did. But I worked hard and caught up, and I was able to move to Level One within a week. That was a relief. In classes, I continued to feel as though the other students understood the material better than I did, but it wasn’t too big a deal. I got out of my room within a week. Being on Level One was a reward.

I’ve been here, at FMA, for one month. At first, I was sad to think that no other new students would come after me, but then Cree arrived, so I’m no longer the youngest in our family.

Idea of the Month by Paul B.

I believe that our natural human state is to be peaceful, loving, kind, thoughtful and understanding. So why do some of us keep going back to hating or picking on people for no reason? This isn’t true of all people, but sometimes it seems that for many of us, it’s our thing.

What I’ve learned is that what you practice for long enough, will be what you become. So, sometimes, in an effort to make people like us, we stray from our own true nature, but in not staying true to ourselves, we are sacrificing our own ability to feel good about ourselves. When I am true to my nature, I feel better. I feel clear about whom I am meant to be, which is how I think all of us should feel.

I have the power over my attitude toward myself, and the people and world around me. What I do is all a result of my attitudes, and I hope to remain true to myself, so I can continue to live in my natural human state.

Attitude by Joseph S.

The only thing that I can control is my attitude towards what I am given in life. Take the past expedition for example. For the first couple of days, I had a crummy attitude toward the expedition, and I had a very dull and dreary experience. I admit it; I wanted out. But once I realized that I was the one who was letting the situation make it uncomfortable for me, I was able to change my attitude toward the weather and the food, and I had a relatively good time.

I think that the only way we can truly achieve freedom is when we have freed ourselves from bad attitudes, because they not only harm us, but they harm the people around us as well. One amazing example of how our attitudes can affect the people around us is a scene from the movie, Braveheart. At the beginning of this battle of epic proportions, William Wallace’s attitude of perseverance and strength radiated outward to the troops, who were beginning to lose heart in their cause. Wallace was able to give them faith in what they were fighting for by showing them, through his own attitude, why they should be fighting, not running away. All in all, I have realized that my attitude is the key to a free and wonderful life.

The Story of Autumn Leaves by Chana K.

In the springtime a bud grows on the tip of a twig. After a few weeks, a green leaf begins to form. In the summer, the leaves are converting the sunlight into the energy that helps them grow. Color in the leaves comes from sunlight as many different colors such as violet, red, orange etc., however what we see is green.

The green color we see is from chlorophyll, which converts sunlight and water into food for the tree. When autumn comes, and the tree begins to prepare for winter, a thin layer of cells forms where the leaf meets the branch, and prevents any more water from coming through. Without the water, the chlorophyll begins to disappear, and the other colors, which have been there all along, come through.

In the mountains, on expedition, it was gorgeous. Hiking on the trail, I looked out and saw valleys of color. From my window at the school, I can see the red and yellow of the leaves all around me. Now you know why!

Fear by Jonathan C.

Fear is a powerful emotion. Some people hide their fear, even though it is better to be open about it, so that it can be faced head-on. I hide my fear at times, and, when I do, I don’t often notice how it is holding me back. The reason I hide my fears is to make myself look like I’m fearless so people will think highly of me. When I notice what I am doing, I try to get rid of my fear either by using it to make me stronger, or sometimes by just recognizing that it can’t really hurt me. I think of Batman, who overcame his terror of bats by incorporating them into his alter-ego.

Fear is the root of many emotions that do me no good. Fear leads me to anger, which leads me to hate, which leads me to rejection, which leads me to self pity and so on.

One of the keys to overcoming fear is truly knowing yourself. As Sun Tzu said, “Know yourself, know your enemy (fear), 1000 encounters, 1000 victories.” The first step to victory is knowing yourself.

Movie Review: The Scarlet and the Black by Myles R.

The movie I am writing about, The Scarlet and the Black, was directed by Jerry London and starred Gregory Peck, Christopher Plummer and John Gielgud.

It takes place during World War II, and tells the true story of a Catholic priest, who helped prisoners of war and Jews to escape the Nazis in Italy. He, and others, tried to get the Jews to the Vatican, which, although it is in the city of Rome, which was under Nazi control, had the status of an independent country.

My opinion of the movie is that it is a very good movie, and I recommend it. The part I liked most was learning more about World War II and what the Nazis did to the Jews and what the Jews did about it. I was inspired by watching all the people who put their lives on the line to try and help the Jews, and it made me feel as though I would also want to help them if I could.

I Realize I am Where I am Because of All the Work I've Done by Jonathan C.

When I’m not working, I look over the mountains and I just can’t believe how gorgeous they are. Colorful trees cover their massive sides, and the blue sky and white clouds make everything more luminous. Then there are the stars and the moon at night, like layers of beauty. The fact that they are there amazes me. How did they get there anyway?


When I’m not working, I’m usually playing my bass on the porch looking at all this while I play. I realize that I am where I am because of all the work and homework that I’ve done. Well, that is, if you want to call it homework, since I do live here.

But when I don’t do what I’m told, I get two hours of work on Saturday. Saturdays and Sundays are work free, unless you do something wrong.

There is one thing I have a hard time with: getting homework done. Part of the problem is I’m not very good at managing my time. Managing my time is hard, because there is so much work, but somehow I get it all done, just in the nick of time.


And when I do, there is my bass waiting to be played under the sky looking at the mountains.

How I Maintain Happiness by Sean S.

So, how do I maintain my happiness when I am happy?

I don’t bother myself with others’ gossip. Those are just ignorant words that make me dislike the person I am gossiping about even more.

I maintain a smile when I can.

I keep my space clutter free. When my space is messed up, I feel crowded and like I might have to go back and clean it later.

I like to do a five minute meditation to clear my mind. It’s not necessary, but it helps get me away from all the things that crowd my mind and to be at peace.

I try to be willing to learn and accept change at all times, but not to change if it is not in my best interest. I look at the whole picture and weigh the benefits.

I help all I can, even if it’s for an enemy, or if I’m being forced to. It lifts my conscience.

I try to be as nice as I can. I don’t hold my mind on things like grudges.

I think before vocalizing. It makes my words more efficient, and I realize that what I might have said, may have made me sound ignorant.

I keep an open mind to life, because I never know what is coming, and it’s nice to be prepared.

The Fire in the Rain by Paul B.

The sound of my feet moving slowly over loose rocks, the color of coffee, squished in the mud from the people in front of me, puts me in a trance. I take deep breaths, not heavy, just slow calm breaths.


The smell of the rocks and the mud brought me out of the trance and into a place I have never been, just a place where I used to go in my mind as a little boy.

For just a few minutes I was surrounded by large oak trees hanging over a sun glazed path. In the background was the splashing sound of water on water flowing down majestic moss covered rocks. That’s where the smell took me. It was the smell of fresh earth after the rain.

Coming back from these thoughts onto the trail, a feeling of peace came over me. Looking around, I saw the sun streaking through the branches of the trees, lighting the leaves in a way that a photograph could never capture.

When we arrived at the campsite, and I took off my backpack, the release of the weight on my shoulders made me feel like I was going to float above the earth.


As I set up my tent, rain began to fall gently, and then it stopped. The break in the weather was like a sign from God that I should start my fire. I grabbed the matches, the candle, and twigs, and, even though the wood was wet, I still made a fire.

When I make a fire in the rain it makes me so happy I want to dance. So, naturally, I did. As I was doing my dance, the rain started to fall again. I guess my little jig was a rain dance.

I sat by my fire as the rain started to fall harder and harder making tapping sounds on the hood of my raingear. But the rain did not affect the fire. As I thought about this, I realized that I want to be like the fire.

Even though the rain fell all around and in it, the fire still kept burning. It crackled and snapped as the wet wood burned, and the smoke took whatever path it chose. I want to be like the fire in the rain: strong and taking the path I choose.

The Leaves of Autumn by Chana K.

The leaves of spring and summer are falling.

Changing colors of the fallen leaves,
Show a yellow, red, and green path.
As I brush up against some leaves, they change.
Dream like, they float light as feathers.

It is somewhat sad,
This year’s summer and spring are gone.
The frost is coming fast.
It is a cycle of nature,
Going around and around.
Dream like, this journey ends.

Inner Peace by Patrick C.

I never used to think about meditating, but I saw Sean and Paul sitting outside doing it and that sparked my interest. I talked to Paul about it and he brought up some of its good aspects, so I asked him to walk me through meditating. I feel as though meditating does relax me, and it helps me to get rid of unwanted stress.

Meditating is when I close my eyes and mind of all thoughts and concentrate on one thing. For me, I hold a flame in my mind and focus all my energies into it. There is also an open-eye method, where I pick something out and stare at it and hold it in my thoughts.I focus on how beautiful it is. Those are just a couple of the ways I have learned to meditate.

The good thing about meditating is that it helps me clear my mind of things that make it hard to think straight. When I meditate, I think about the good and not the bad. It puts me in a more peaceful frame of mind, so it’s easier for me to do things like sleep, relax and rest.

I can meditate anytime and anywhere. Meditation is a state of mind and my mind can never be taken away from me unless I let it, so the ability to meditate is always with me. In the middle of a field, on the subway, in an office, or lying in my bed, my mind is with me, so I still have the power of meditation.

It is easy for me to meditate. All I have to do is find a comfortable position. Then I close my eyes or concentrate on an object. I relax my mind and just let it flow where it wants to go, then I slowly clear my mind and get rid of all the clutter. When I find peace of mind, I gently hold on to it, and try not to force it, because peace is not force.

Movie Review: Inglourious Basterds by Joseph S.

Even though Inglourious Basterds is not the most historically accurate WWII movie, it is one of the most entertaining. A good storyline, great actors, and amazing special effects will have action movie fans riveted to the screen throughout.
The main plot line is that of a group of eight elite, Jewish-American soldiers, who parachute behind enemy lines and, using guerilla tactics, strike terror and wreak havoc in the German army.
The acting in this movie is exceptional. One of my favorites was Eli Roth who played the part of Donny Donowitz, also known as Bear Jew for his reputation of breaking the heads of German officers with a baseball bat. Brad Pitt plays Aldo Raine, the leader of The Basterds, as they were known, and his specialty was carving a swastika into the foreheads of the German soldiers, who he let go.
Quentin Tarantino did an admirable job as the writer and director of this movie. His characters played well off each other, making the whole movie that much better. In usual Tarantino style, the movie is extravagant, particularly in its most historically inaccurate moment when the Inglourious Basterds kill Adolph Hitler by shooting him and then blowing him up.

Students Read, Students Review...

Freedom Mountain Academy students are big readers! In our unique environment, they do not have access to cell phones, Blackberries, email, instant messaging, video games, Ipods, or any other electronic distractions. So, they read. In addition to the FMA literature program, they peruse our extensive shelves of fiction, history, biographies, poetry, and outdoor lore. Many students when they arrive make the declaration "I don't read," but before they leave they have read, on average, 15 to 16 books during their nine month stay.

But, its not just reading. FMA students think about what they read, and there is no better evidence of this than the book reviews they write for the student newsletter, Mountain Musings.

So, with summer reading on everyone's mind, here is a selection of what Freedom Mountain Academy students are recommending for you!

The Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett
Reviewed by Garrett C.

The Pillars of the Earth, by Ken Follett is a 600-page epic about a small town trying to create a better church, while struggling to adapt to the ever-changing world around it. This book is quite a page-turner, thanks to Follett’s detailed portrait of the era, excellent storytelling, and dramatic and exciting action.
When the story begins, Tom Builder, a master builder, was seeking work so he and his family would not starve. They ended up in Kingsbridge where he found work at the priory rebuilding the church. Meanwhile, William Hamleigh, one of the novel’s primary antagonists, and his mother were trying to gain earldom over William’s ex-fiancée Aliena. A tragic series of events led Aliena and her brother to Kingsbridge, where she met Tom and his adopted son Jack. As first Tom, and then Jack, worked on the building of the church, it grew to symbolize the tension between characters as well as the town becoming united, stronger, and bigger.
As each character’s story was developed, it was incorporated into the main narrative, leading to a multi-character climax in which even the distant back-stories played a vital role. As the book comes to a close, the cathedral is completed and all of the characters get the ending they have earned.
The Pillars of the Earth is a remarkable story that is well worth reading.


The Silver Chair by C.S. Lewis
Reviewed by Kelsey G.

The Silver Chair by C.S. Lewis is a very meaningful story about not giving up no matter what. It taught me that when I'm going through challenging times I must keep moving forward and not give up despite how tempted I am.
In the book, the main characters, Jill and Eustace, two English school children, were given the task of finding Prince Rilian by Aslan, a very noble lion, who told them to not give up unless they had succeeded in their mission.
Puddleglum, a helpful marshwiggle, who traveled with them through Narnia, following the specific signs Aslan had given Jill, aided the children on their quest. The signs were: Eustace would meet an old and dear friend, and, when he did, they would have help on their journey. Second, they must journey out of Narnia, to the north, until they found the ruined city of the ancient giants. There, they would find writing upon a stone and they were to follow whatever it said. Lastly, Aslan said they would know the lost prince (if they found him) because he would be the first person they met in their travels to use Aslan's name.
At first, Jill carefully remembered and followed the signs; however, when things got tough she became lazy and began to believe that the signs were never there. Puddleglum, the children's faithful guide, was the one who helped Eustace and Jill move forward and not give up.
On their journey they encountered giants at Harfang Castle, where they went after meeting the mysterious Lady of the Green Kirtle who invited them to Harfang for the autumn. Hungry for warmth and comfort, the children forgot all about their mission to save Prince Rilian until they found out they were going to be eaten by the "friendly giants" at the autumn feast. At the castle, they suddenly remembered their instructions from Alsan and, once again working together, escaped.
While fleeing all three of them fell down a hole into what's known as the Underworld, where for several days and nights, they had to travel in darkness. Upon arriving at the queen of the Underland's castle, the rescuers freed Prince Rilian, after he had spoken Aslan's name, and then narrowly escaped capture by the witch who tried enchanting them with potent charms. Fortunately, Puddleglum stamped out the magical fire, and he, Eustace and Rilian killed the witch after she had turned into an enormous serpent.
Upon the queen's death all her spells were destroyed which set free all the gnomes and other strange Underland inhabitants. Prince Rilian and the children returned to the Overworld just in time to see the King's homecoming. Even as his son, Rilian, arrived, the King, who was very ill, passed away. Aslan returned Jill and Eustace to England and their strange school, the Experiment House, with his congratulations.
This book illustrates the idea that when things get challenging we must not give up, but keep moving forward. It is very inspiring and I highly recommend this book if you have not already read it.


American Gods by Neil Gaiman
Reviewed by Jose D.

What are gods? They are what human’s create and believe in, in order to gain spiritual strength. This premise is at the heart of Neil Gaiman’s novel American Gods. Known for creating the popular Sandman series of graphic novels, Gaiman’s novel explores what happens when god’s lose their significance. Do they die? What takes their place?
This story center around a man named Shadow, who is returning home to start a new life after being released from jail. On the way, he is approached by a mysterious man who calls himself Mr. Wednesday, and who offers Shadow a job. Through Shadow the book takes us on a journey of events, leading up to war between the forgotten gods of the old, and the new “American Gods” of television, computers, and others including a federal organization similar to the FBI, which exists only because people believe it exists.
Gaiman has incorporated extensive mythological history in compiling the gods of this book, blending Norse, African, Egyptian, Albanian, and many, many more mythologies.
This book earns a 5 (out of 5) star rating because it is rich, entertaining, and has a purely original story line. It has fascinating characters that enrich the story as a whole, in a classic blend of old and new mythology. Throughout the book, there is use of actual landmarks in America, which is outstanding. This book is truly a treasure, and I am glad we have someone with as great a mind as Neil Gaiman. I recommend this book to all readers ages 13 and above.


Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
Reviewed by David S.
Man’s Search for Meaning is a provocative autobiography written by Viktor Frankl, a former inmate of a Nazi death camp. First published in 1956, the book is a case study of Logotherapy, an innovative form of psychotherapy, and how it allowed Frankl to maintain his humanity under horrific circumstances.
The main point of the story, which Frankl repeatedly conveys, is that “It is not how you avoid suffering but rather how you cope with it that keeps your spirit intact or shatters it altogether.” This is demonstrated in many cases, most powerfully as Frankl is being transferred from one camp to another. As he rode in a cramped filthy train, he was unaware of where he was going. The only two possibilities were Mauthausen or Dachau. Although Frankl was supposed to have stayed in Auschwitz with his friends, he did not despair when the SS rounded him up. Rather he rejoiced, as the train headed toward Dachau rather than the certain death of Mauthausen.
In addition, he focused not on how bad things were in the camps, or how good things used to be, but rather he set goals for the future, such as becoming a professor of psychology, and completing his book. This gave his life a purpose, and motivated him to keep on living.
Although the book was unpleasant to me, I learned valuable lessons from it. I learned how best to persevere through my sufferings in life without losing my humanity. I also learned how important a person’s state of mind and outlook on life are to achieving a meaningful existence.


1984 by George Orwell
Reviewed by Katy K.

In George Orwell’s classic novel, 1984, a dictatorship controls society by controlling its ability to think and perceive reality.
The reader is introduced to The Party and learns of its methods through the eyes of Winston Smith, as he works at his job at The Ministry of Truth. There, he re-writes history to match whatever present claim The Party is making, while simultaneously destroying all evidence that the past has ever been anything but its present version. Orwell makes the point that if history is a lie, than truth cannot exist in the present, and the population will accept whatever it is told. Another character at the Ministry of Truth is systematically altering how people think by eliminating words from the dictionary. If people cannot know the truth, and also lack the ability to find words to express their thoughts, they simply give up.
When we first meet Winston, he has already decided to go against The Party. He has committed a “thought-crime” by buying a diary, and beginning to record his thoughts and the events of his life. This is not allowed, because private citizens are not allowed to record a version of events other than that of The Party. With this act, Winston begins a series of infractions, including entering into a romantic relationship (also forbidden) and finally contacting a member of what he believed to be the opposition.
1984 is not about a revolutionary, it is about a simple man who is distressed by the world in which he lives, and just wants to believe that there is absolute truth in something. When I began reading 1984, I expected it to be sort of like a Will Smith film: a futuristic story of rebellion and technology, but what I realized is that Winston’s life is actually happening to us. Many of us do not look beneath the surface of what we are told, and even more of us lack the words to express our own ideas. How could a government exist that dictates how and what I should think? It may already be here. This book was disturbing while at the same time enlightening.


We the Living by Ayn Rand
Reviewed by Jacob C.

We the Living, by Ayn Rand examines the survival of the individual spirit in a world that demands allegiance to a collective mentality.
The novel, set in Russia in 1922, immediately after the revolution, portrays the struggle of three young people to hold to their ideals in the face of the bleak new Soviet reality. Kira Arguonova, the 18-year-old main character dreams of a world in which she can realize her dreams. Her lover, Leo Kovalesky rages against a system which systematically chips away at his spirit. Andrei Taganov, a young leader in the Communist party struggles when his faith in the revolution is tested by the venality of the party leadership.
Hunger, fear, and creeping apathy plague all three. Kira, in a struggle to survive, agrees to be Andrei’s mistress in exchange for money to keep herself and Leo alive. As Leo sinks further into cynicism and compromise, his spirit begins to bow to the pressure of a system which demands allegiance to a collective, while turning a blind eye to it’s inequities. Even as everything Kira once loved about Leo disintegrates, she finds herself unable to see the truth, and clings to him with increasing desperation; a desperation which will not allow her to see that it is in fact Andrei who is emerging as a stronger example of the human spirit. Her blindness ultimately puts all three on a tragic course.
We the Living was Ayn Rand’s first novel, preceding the more well known novels The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged, however its powerful portrayal of the magnificence of the human spirit, shines just as clearly.


April Morning by Howard Fast
Reviewed by Valarie P.

A boy’s journey to recognizing the requirements of manhood and learning to make his own choices is the underlying message woven through Howard Fast’s novel April Morning.
In this action filled novel, 15-year-old Adam and his father Moses join the militia of their town against the British army on April 19, 1775. While many died, including Adam’s father, they still succeeded in what would become the first battle of the Revolutionary War.
Adam, who has struggled with his father, lies awake the night before the conflict, listening to his parents argue over whether he should be allowed to join the militia.
“I can keep my son out of it, he’s just a boy.”
“Yesterday he was a boy,” father replied, his voice dull and troubled. “Tonight he is not…”
“I don’t understand that kind of talk, a boy does not become a man overnight. It takes learning, growing, hurting and most of all it takes time.”
“We don’t always have time.”
In this moving story, Adam Cooper, under the pressure of life and death situations, acquires the strength he needs to know his beliefs and to take responsibility for his actions, and in doing so is transformed overnight from a boy to a man. His attachment to childish things, while struggling to be seen as an adult is over, and his life is changed forever.
“Then, falling asleep, I said goodbye to childhood. A world, a secure and sun warmed existence, a past that was over, and done with, and gone away for all time.”
Adam became a man, knowing his father thought he was ready.

Solo Reflections by Paul B.

While I was out there I thought a lot about my past, and the one thing that kept coming back to me was how badly I had treated my family before I came here. But the most significant thought was how much I truly love my family and how they would do anything for me, and how I should give back to them the same respect they give me.
What was my first thought when I was left alone?
I was really light headed . I thought to myself, why am I here? Why didn’t I just leave before solo? Then I remembered I was here for the experience of it all, and I went on.
My thoughts on the second morning:
I was glad that I slept through the night. That was when I first started feeling weak, and I sat by my fire and thought about what I would do over the summer. Who would I truly be? Would I keep the same habits that I have built here, or would I go back to the old habits? I thought about where both roads would lead me. Then I knew which one was right, but also would be the hardest. I have to find strength in my self before I face the outside.
My thoughts on the third morning:
I thought about how far I have come this year, and how much I have learned. I got to a point where I was getting confused about the whole thing. I thought what would happen if they told me to do this when I first came here. I thought that the end of this road was near, and I had to find the next one to go down.
I spent the first day thinking mostly about the urgent, like shelter, food and water. But by the last three days I started thinking about the future and the past. I thought about the things that could happen, and would happen. I spent about fifty percent of thinking about the past and fifty percent thinking about the future.
I think being in this meditative state of mind helped be to not always be in the urgent. I spent most of my time in my own thoughts.

Solo Reflections by Garrett C.

The most significant experience on solo, for me, was the second evening, when I realized that my grandparents are soon going to be gone, and I will be on my own for support. Although I spent most of my time reading, I also thought of what I am going to do in the next few years of college, and after. I did not spend a lot of time thinking about the past, but I did think back to my first days at FMA, and last year’s solo expedition. I came to the conclusion that this year was somewhat easier, because I had the skills more cemented in my mind.
For the first day of solo, I mainly thought of how I was going to survive for the next three days. I thought of what would be the easiest shelter to make, and other urgent things. After I finished doing everything I needed to do, I sat down and read for the remainder of the day.
The second and third days, since I had more time, I wrote, read and reflected more. I thought mainly of home and how life is going to change after graduating this year. I thought of how much fun I’m going to have working at the camp again this summer, and ways that I could make the camp a better place for kids to enjoy themselves and learn valuable lessons from The Bible.

Solo Reflections by Jacob C.

The most significant experience I encountered on solo expedition:
On this expedition, just after I was left alone, I felt as if someone had cut my legs off and left me to slowly bleed to death. I was completely alone and had to completely depend upon myself for survival. With that knowledge came the certainty that I would perish.
As my time progressed, and I was forced to help myself, I began to slowly lose it, and everything seemed to be going wrong. In reality it was myself who was losing a grasp on everything I had previously thought to be true of myself.
On the third day of solo, I was ready for it to all be over. I was ready to leave this nasty little mud-pit that was my shelter and rejoin civilized society. I felt alone, and exhausted. I didn’t want to move, but I would have run ten miles to be done with solo.
On the morning of day four, I was full of enthusiasm, but it wasn’t because I was leaving. It was for the fact that I had survived, and survived with style. As I walked out of Gentry Creek, I was able to hold my head high. I had been hungry, tired, scared and alone, but still, I had triumphed. While I hiked out, I was able to think about where my mind had been for the last four days. I realized that all my time was spent reflecting on the past and about the future. What would come next? How well will I handle it? Have I done a good job? What should I have done differently? This is what I thought about the majority of the time, when I wasn’t preoccupied with the urgent stuff such as food, water, and shelter. But that only occupied about ten percent of my time there.
So, for me, the most significant experience was being able to walk out with my head held high and a sense of self confidence. It is the one thing that stays with me, even now, and though it was hard, I’m glad I did it.

Solo Reflections by Jessie H.

I believe the most significant experience during solo, was realizing how much I used to take food for granted. When I was thinking about my past, I realized that the food my Mom bought for almost always went unappreciated. I may have enjoyed eating it, but I forgot her kindness in buying it. I spent most of my time reflecting upon my past and all the nice meals I didn’t finish. I felt as though I was beating myself up about it, but I couldn’t stop thinking about it. For example, over spring break, my Mom took me out to lunch at my favorite restaurant, and then after getting our legs waxed, she took me to a coffee place. I was still full from lunch, but she wouldn’t let me get only a coffee. So I got a snicker doodle cookie. I didn’t eat it for almost a week. It sat on my desk next to my bed and I ate one little piece at a time, not really enjoying it, but getting it off my desk. On solo, I wanted that cookie so bad, I would have done anything and I hated myself for being so unappreciative.
I spent some of my time focusing on the food I would eat once I get home, but I wondered if I would still want it by then.
I sometimes wondered how my Mom would act if she had known how hungry I was. I wondered if she would bring be platters of food and force me to eat until I couldn’t move. I would have really liked that.
I thought about what Mr. Kevin said about someone saying that “sex is mankind’s strongest instinct.” I thought that whoever said that was an idiot. I wanted food.

Solo Reflections by Katy K.

I felt Mr. Mike tap me on the shoulder, quietly telling me that this was going to be my campsite for the next three days. I looked around. This wasn’t the place I was hoping for, but it was mine and I was going to determine how things were going to run around here. I nodded quickly, and asked Mr. Mike where the best shelter and fishing sites were.
Then I was alone, out in the sun. All the clothes on my back were too hot, so I took some of them off. I thought this place was beautiful and I was going to make it mine.
Quickly I stashed my armful of clothes near a pile of rocks. Then I grabbed my hiking stick and day pack. “This shelter has to be sweet,” I said to myself out loud. “Oh no, I’m already talking to myself.”
I went up the hill above Gentry Creek, and found a huge rock wall as the start of my shelter. I wasn’t sure about this spot, but I set about finding sturdy wood to protect me from the weather. I felt like I needed inspiration on how I was to build my shelter; ideas from someone else. I thought about how Dominick, Mike, Matt and Mom had done this. I was ready to do this all for the experience.
I looked at my watch. 11:30. I started to wonder if everyone else was sitting down enjoying a fire, their shelters built, basking in the sun with a book in hand. “Oh, forget this shelter,” I thought to myself.
I thought I felt my energy draining already. I wanted to get water and forage around to see this place. It seemed beautiful, and I wanted to live in the moment in it, but I needed to get the shelter done first. I went further down to look for a new site, all the while contemplating whether I’d have a fire going before sunset. I found a new place that seemed satisfying. I checked my compass, and started over building a shelter. I made it sturdy and to my satisfaction.
I started having an eerie feeling about what is going to happen to me next year. So much I don’t know. Where to go from here? What’s my future? I have no idea.
At 3:00 p.m. I tried to meet up with my trail partner, but her watch was an hour off, so she came later. I felt like I was wasting time. The sun was falling and it was going to get cold and I had no fire, no hot rocks, no plants and no fish. So I hurried to finish the shelter with a massive amount of wood, leaves and rhododendron. I had decided to some pine branches over it later.
The sun was continuing to fall westward, when I saw Mr. Mike and Mr. Kevin down the trail. I thought Mr. Kevin was coming to join us on solo, or he was coming by to see someone. So, I half expected him and Mr. Mike to go by my shelter, but they stopped.
“Hello Catherine,” Mr. Mike said.
“Not good,” I thought.
He informed me that the doctor had gotten the ultra-sound results, and that I had to go in to be put on a prescription for my hypo-thyroid condition.
I stared at them, and thought how I wasn’t going to be able to prove to myself how this would help me, how I didn’t need to be watched out for. But I was glad that I was leaving because I felt exhausted. Mr. Mike kindly wrapped up my clothes into my poncho, and attached it to my daypack.
I walked back down Gentry Creek, with Mr. Kevin following behind me. I had so many questions running through my mind. I knew hypo meant under and that the thyroid controlled my blood. They wouldn’t be taking me out for no reason.
“Why can’t my mind think past this minute?” I thought. “I need to handle this situation assuredly. But I couldn’t shake the feeling that I had no control over my own self.